Journaling: Loss & Self-Love
Exploring loss and it's often subtle but profound impacts on Self-Love
Loss has been on my mind for several months. My mother is now 95 and recently began hospice care. I’ve been contemplating what life will be like without her, what that loss will feel like, how the loss of that love and support will impact me. How will it impact my sense of self?
This has led to wondering about how other forms of loss in my life have impacted me, how I see myself, what I believe about myself, how I feel about myself, how they have impacted my level of self-love, and how all my emotions around loss have taken hold in my body.
Even if there are silver linings to loss, and gratitude for what was had, many forms of loss can take a toll on our wellbeing and self-love. Feelings of rejection, loss of stability and safety, feeling of anxiety come up. Self-Love is often bolstered by the love and support of another being, losing that can be devastating to our ability to love ourselves.
For me, loss tends to expose my vulnerabilities and feelings of not being good enough. And really, who wants to look at this? I stuff it down, experience it just as anger, and do my best to carry on. But it’s there, it holds me back, this sense of not being enough.
Painful as it may be, revisiting specific losses and exploring my emotions has helped me to acknowledge self-perceptions and ways that I have not loved myself enough. I believe we have to witness what is, and understand how we react to things, in order to grow into who we wish to be and create happy lives.
Journaling
I’ve found journaling helpful in uncovering thoughts and emotions, as well as beginning to release them and change them. Give it whirl, see what comes up, maybe something today, maybe nothing tomorrow, maybe something profound the next day. It will come and go as it will.
Beginning with a pause, a few full breaths, and observing what I feel physically usually leads to something on the page. Pen and paper are my preference, I think there is something about feeling the flow of the pen that helps my emotions, and tension, to flow out. When the words stop flowing I try to sit with my feelings and offer Love to myself and my wounds.
It’s your practice, do what works for you. Reach out to someone if intense emotions come up, we all struggle. 🩷
Here are a few lines in inquiry you may find helpful in exploring loss and Self-Love.
How has loss impacted me?
What types of loss, or specific losses have had the most significant impact on me?
What feelings and emotions have come up from loss?
How does loss feel in my body?
Has loss impacted how I feel about myself?
Is there a common thread to the wounds and/or how I have felt about myself as a response to different losses?
Has my level of Self-Love been impacted by loss?
How would I like to feel?
Is there something I want to change about how I feel about myself, how much I love myself?
Listen to a meditation to soften the edges and create more balance in your being. ☀️ is for day, 😴 is for when you wish to sleep.
